costumes, Costumes, COSTUMUES!!!

Costumes are crazy fun. Good idea to head to (insert big box store here) around mid-October and gobble up three or four costumes for the kiddies, if anything's left. They usually mark them down 30%, then 50%, then more as it gets closer to Halloween. My boys can run around in whatever silly/funny/goofy costume they happen to think of and are content most of the day. They each probably have three or four at least that still fit, and counting. Easy fun. And not just for that one day of the year.

Where the Wild Things Are

We've read this several times lately. Must be on our minds a lot the past month. My boys are pretty excited about the movie. Not nearly as excited as I am about the movie. Such a short, simple, subtle and beautful book. Sendak, Spike Jonze, Dave Eggars - it's almost as if it's too good to be great. Or something like that.

Punishment

Punishment sucks. No fun for the parent, nor the child. Some parents may spank their kids for discipline. Not in my house. I just don't think it's necessary. It's never necessary to hit a child. Call it spanking, it's still hitting a child. Time outs, taking away privileges - those things are just no fun at all. But it's important as parents to stick with the punishment, when your heart might say that he's learned his lesson, let's just forget the punishment. Can't do that. That harms a child much more. Punishing the kids just is not fun, but it's gotta be done from time to time.

Reading Jonathon Livingston Seagull

I'd forgotten this - which is lame and sad - but, seems I insisted on reading my eldest son Jon Seagull by Richard Bach when he was percolating in the womb. He kicked a lot at this. It is a soaring, beautiful tale, if memory serves. I believe I'll break it out again and read it anew to both my boys - now six and four.

I don't believe in retaining information from the womb, but I can see a non-tangible sort of something. My oldest is very, very perseptive, highly sensitive and in tune with things I cannot fathom. We'll see if he gets anything from it. Jon Seagull, fun for all ages.

Reading with the kids

My boys love reading. They love stories. This is one of the simplest and purest forms of educating our children. Not to get all metaphysical and after-school special here, but there's something special about spending 20 minutes reading to your kids. I'm a bit conservative with stories. Can't do the Captain Underpants or heavier topics. My boys are just four and six. But can't go wrong with Shel Silverstein. He's the best. "Chapter books" are good too, like the Magic Treehouse series. Those are great for a 4-6 year old. The story itself is just a small part of it. The beauty and innocense of reading to your child. It's unspeakably beautiful. And it works just as much for the parent as for the child.

Dealing with bedtime fears

Most all children have fears. The fears surface most at bedtime. There's a monster in the closet. That's a scary sound. What's under my bed. I like to check the closets and under the beds and let the boys watch me check. That helps. Lying down with them, letting them see me close my eyes and relax, that helps a lot too. Nightlights are a must. My boys have one that's plenty bright. Letting the children see the parent content and happy, that's always going to help. Children act as they are taught. Telling a nice soft story while lying next to them usually soothes and lulls as well. Easier said than done. But as with all fears, they fade quickly.

Great post from honestbaby.com

This is a great conversation between a six year old and her father.

www.honestbaby.com/content/blog/your-dad-is-an-idiot

Sibling Rivalries

These always occur in brothers. Especially when so close in age, such as my six and four year olds. Sharing is tough to learn. My two are actually excellent at sharing. But of course not always. When they share it is such a beautiful sight. But those rare occasions when they don't - well, that's rather interesting as well. I'm sure all parents see this - a toy sits untouched and unwanted. One of them picks it up, so the other decides instantly that it's the holy grail and they must have it. I usually try to back off for the most part - they usually work it out rather quickly on their own. If only Daddy doesn't butt in and make it worse. I think children deserve the chance to work it out first. Then obviously step in. But give those little ones a chance. Easier said than done, especially to a nerve-y nut such as myself

The Bedtime Routine

This is a tough one. I've read enough to know I'm not alone. Children just have a hard time settling down and getting to sleep. They're wound up from the day - summer time especially. Being quiet and still just doesn't sound like much fun. I've found extra stories help. Usually. We love Shel Silverstein. Especially Falling Up, Where the Sidewalk Ends and A Light in the Attic. We always return to Shel. "Chapter Books" are really good too. And making up silly stories is often our bedtime story of choice. It doesn't take a lot of imagination to make up a silly story on the fly. But beyond story time, I'm pretty lost when trying to get my little ones to bed. This will remain a work in progress. A wonderful, humbling, often difficult but spectacular work in progress.

Manners

My boys are just wonderful. Really, the best little guys. When they misbehave, I have to consider any time I've ever been in a store. Children in general lack manners. And they're very very loud. And disrespectful. And loud. I see that and want to rush home and tell my boys how proud I am of them. No clue where they get that. They're just wonderful boys.

Seriously, manners is one of the easiest things to begin teaching children. Also possibly one of the hardest to deeply instill in them. Who says "thank you" and "please" all the time? Who would want to? And how would a child be expected when to and when not to. Not easy. But the simple part is beginning the thing - saying thank you when someone hands you something. Adding the word please when asking nicely for something. That's a start. Not sure my boys were ever taught that so much as just knowing it. Maybe I've mentioned it - they're phenomenal children.

new

pmhx2zftc8

Apologizing

This is a tough one. Well, they're all tough ones. But I recall having to apologize as a child and not really liking that. I'm not sure a parent should force an apology if it's not genuine, that's asking your child to lie. The key is to gently nudge them toward it. Every instance is different, and every child is different. My four year old will apologize in a different manner - and timeframe - than his six year old brother. But their little disagreements generally end quickly - "I'm sorry for..." followed by "I accept your apology...".

But then I'm fortunate. My children are very nearly perfect ;)

the joys of simplicity

I have the most wonderful children on earth. Really. Interesting, fascinating in fact, thoughtful, creative, bold yet sensitive, so very well behaved yet a bit mischievous. Absolutely wonderful boys. Obviously most parents feel the same and wouldn't be wrong. A smile, a hug, a joke, a playful gesture, a short conversation. These little insignificant aspects of each day are not at all insignificant. They are what matter the most.

reading is fun

Always, always always read to your children. This is one of those unquantifiable gifts. For both the parent and the child. Reading a new one is great. Returning to old favorites is great as well. Shel Silverstein is my six year old's favorite. That's just because he hasn't yet experienced Le Petit Prince. It's what you do each and every day. Read to the kids. It will open worlds of possibilities.

the wisdom of a six year old

After seeing fireworks on the 4th:
"...and I saw a guy that had on the latest summer fashions..." - noting the amount of visible underwear showing above someone's pants.

When pausing just a second to clear my throat while reading Shel Silverstein:
"that's enough Dad, carry on"

In response to the question "what are you giggling at?"
"I was just remembering the beauty of SpongeBob"

Who is this child? What kid of six years speaks like this. What an awesome little guy.

Intro

When I found out I was going to be a father for the first time I just knew the child was going to be a girl. Knew it. Knew it many years prior. Baby boy, seven pounds even. Two years, 4 months later, again, this one would have to be a little girl. Obviously not. Two wonderful sons. And I wouldn't change a thing.